Hunting Time by Jeffery Deaver

Description from Amazon:

THERE ARE TWO FUNDAMENTAL RULES OF SURVIVAL.
#1: NEVER BE WITHOUT A MEANS OF ESCAPE.
Allison Parker is on the run with her teenage daughter, Hannah, and Colter Shaw has been hired by her eccentric boss, entrepreneur Marty Harmon, to find and protect her. Though he’s an expert at tracking missing persons—even those who don’t wish to be found—Shaw has met his match in Allison, who brings all her skills as a brilliant engineer designing revolutionary technology to the game of evading detection.
#2: NEVER BE WITHOUT ACCESS TO A WEAPON.
The reason for Allison’s panicked flight is soon apparent. She’s being stalked by her ex-husband, Jon Merritt. Newly released from prison and fueled by blinding rage, Jon is a man whose former profession as a police detective makes him uniquely suited for the hunt. And he’s not alone. Two hitmen are also hot on her heels—an eerie pair of thugs who take delight not only in murder but in the sport of devising clever ways to make bodies disappear forever. Even if Shaw manages to catch up with Allison and her daughter, his troubles will just be beginning.
SHAW IS ABOUT TO DISCOVER RULE #3:
NEVER BELIEVE ANYTHING.
As Shaw ventures further into the wilderness, the truth becomes as hard to decipher as the forest’s unmarked trails…and peril awaits at every turn.

So, honestly, with the blurb giving us excitement about Allison on the run and Colter tracking her, it sounded like a good setup. I’d read one or two of the Colter Shaw books before, and they weren’t too bad. I figured since this was Deaver it’d be good too.

But I really don’t feel the same about Shaw as I do about Rhyme! There is something about Lincoln’s character that is a lot deeper and Shaw feels underdeveloped to me. I appreciated his survivalist backstory and how he integrates it and the fact that he works for “rewards” now but he doesn’t feel like he has enough substance. I think maybe Lincoln’s methodology and each piece of evidence makes it feel as though the cases are really solved through clues, while with Shaw’s case it wasn’t what he was looking for but more of what he was bringing to the party.

Okay, so the story has Allison and Hannah on the run from Jon after his prison release and him threatening to kill Allison. We know Allison has some secret about Jon and is some engineering tech genius, but her using these skills to evade a tracker? I think her skills were highly overrated and more often than not, she just used instinct and good sense. Hannah’s petulance and reliance on the internet was to be expected, and then her about-turn when she was learning all these new skills from Shaw and becoming one with them? Maybe. Just felt forced to me. The thugs following them must have been the dumbest hitmen out. Yes they could kill people but their conversations and actions (and the whole itchy skin thing!) were silly.

Deaver makes plot twists a thing. Then he started creating twists on twists and now he has so many twists in his books that from the beginning you suspect everyone and thus cannot get close to characters or invested in the books. It takes the fun out of loving or hating a character and at the end going “Oh no!” And this twist? Very flat I’m afraid.

When I closed the book, I battled to remember what the beginning was about, and two days later I actually had to read a few reviews to remind myself of parts of the book. That’s never a good sign. I want a book that blows me away to the point where days later I’m still asking why I didn’t see it coming. Oh well… I guess I’ll keep reading his books, hoping for a new one that is amazing. Not even Justin Hartley will save this one.

Hitman Anders and the Meaning of it All by Jonas Jonasson

Description from Amazon

 

It’s always awkward when five thousand kronor goes missing. When it happens at a certain grotty hotel in south Stockholm, it’s particularly awkward because the money belongs to the hitman currently staying in room seven. Per Persson, the hotel receptionist, just wants to mind his own business, and preferably not get murdered. Johanna Kjellander, temporarily resident in room eight, is a priest without a vocation, and, as of last week, without a parish. But right now she has two things at her disposal: an envelope containing five thousand kronor, and an excellent idea . . .

Featuring one violent killer, two shrewd business brains and many crates of Moldovan red wine, Hitman Anders and the Meaning of It All is an outrageously zany story with as many laughs as Jonasson’s multimillion-copy bestseller The Hundred-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out of the Window and Disappeared.

 

I had never read any of this author’s books but I was drawn by the font and the colour of the cover (not the one pictured here) so I figured I’d give it a go. According to other reviewers, this was not as good as the other books by the author, and based on this book, I wouldn’t read the rest.

 

Granted, there were a couple of moments I did have a laugh but I felt like I could have skipped over quite a bit. So in essence you have the receptionist and the priest. They are referred to by those names more often than not so I’ll leave them as such. The money destined for the hitman lands up with the priest and she decides there is a better way of the hitman receiving money and for her to skim as much as possible.

 

The hitman doesn’t seem to know what to do with himself other than be in jail, so tends to do things to get himself incarcerated again and again (but only in the maim not kill category). But now he has people after him and the receptionist and priest decide that, to save themselves, they need to work together and go into the world of marketing. After all, what better than to advertise the services of a hitman on TV? This will control the mobsters and hopefully bring in money, which they will handle (read into that take as much as possible). (The authorities seem to have no issue with this?) Until… the hitman discovers religion and decides that being a hitman is no longer for him. The problem is that they have taken money for hits that he now will not do. So… how do you use religion to make money? You start a church and ask for donations, of course…

 

And the plot goes from there. Some funny moments – the communion wine was quite something – but it fizzled out for me and I started hurrying just to get it finished. Then, when it was done, I actually didn’t even realise I’d read the last page as it was just over. Maybe it was the lost in translation part. Maybe it was the interesting first idea that spiraled and made the characters more and more silly as time/pages went on. Absurd or satire I can laugh at. This just didn’t hold my interest enough for the characters or the story. It feels like time taken from me I could have spent on other books. This might appeal to some, but to me I was never invested enough…

Dexter is Delicious by Jeff Lindsay

Description from Amazon:

Dexter Morgan has always lived a happy homicidal life. He keeps his dark urges in check by adhering to one steadfast rule...he only kills very bad people. But now Dexter is experiencing some major life changes - don’t we all? - and they’re mostly wrapped up in the eight-pound curiosity that is his newborn daughter. Family bliss is cut short, however, when Dexter is summoned to investigate the disappearance of a 17-year-old girl who has been running with a bizarre group of goths who fancy themselves to be vampires. As Dexter gets closer to the truth of what happened to the missing girl, he realizes they are not really vampires so much as cannibals. And, most disturbing...these people have decided they would really like to eat Dexter.

 

So I admit I’m very late to the Dexter scene. Had heard of the series but didn’t start watching it until recently. And I never realised it was based on books! So when I found this book (dumb of me to start on #5) and started reading and saw that Dexter is having a baby at the same place I am at in the series, I laughed. But the difference in which characters are living (or what physical state they are in) between the series and book makes it confusing. Plus the number of people who know his secret is odd. I don’t get why the kids would understand and agree with his “dark passenger” and both think it’s fine. It’s hard not to compare the series to the book because I don’t have the understanding of characters in the previous books, so all I can picture is how they were on the screen.

The inner monologue/voiceover is Dexter to a T, and really adds to the turmoil he is going through now that his baby Lily Anne has completely changed his life. A lot of reviewers said it made him too soft in this book but I think the concern he has that he could pass his genes to his child or that someone like him could “happen” to his child would make him more worried. I did find, though, that the story seemed to happen around him. He didn’t really do a lot in the story himself. And that is very different from what I would expect of Dexter, considering his willingness to make a plan to ensure something happens to the bad guy (I use guy as a turn of phrase here).

So... teenagers go missing and this leads to a club of vampires and eventually a group of cannibals, where we learn of fetishes to eat human flesh but also fetishes to be eaten. Deborah is fixated on rescuing these girls no matter the cost and also has no qualms about putting a toe over the line. I found this Deborah very overbearing and judgmental, and her constantly punching Dexter in the arm? Annoying. It might have been a sibling trait that ran through the books, but come on. Use it once or twice. Deborah also has someone she loves in this book and her feelings about Dexter’s baby bring up her maternal instincts. Deborah? Maternal instincts? Oh yes. And this leads to a revelation that will take Deborah on a path not quite expected.

Rita’s character is even more simpering in the book. On screen she is wishy-washy and her “powerful” moments are soggy at best. But in this book? Falling for Brian’s “dear lady”? Barf... I suppose she will be Lily Anne’s light to Dexter’s dark. But not an inspiring character at all.

Bad guys, rescues, getting off because Daddy has money... all part of the endgame. But sadly, the ending is easily guessable. Dexter’s drug-induced physical scene? Waste of space. Not necessary at all. And a certain character at the end wanting to help another after the stunts they pulled with them previously? Doubtful. Still not a bad book to read though, but not in the blood splatter/will he or won’t he realm of the on-screen series. I’d read the next book just to see Deborah’s path and whether Dexter’s mojo is darkened again, but wonder if characters are losing the plot...